My youngest child has to learn how to meditate. Like, really meditate – sit still and quiet in a dark room for an hour and… meditate. They’re 10. They have ADHD. They can barely sit through a meal, even when on their meds. But in 3 or 4 months, they will take their Black Belt test in Taekwondo, and meditation is required for their final test. I’m super proud of all their hard work; they’ve been studying Taekwondo for over 3 years, and it hasn’t been easy, but for them, this is difficult in an entirely different way.
So what to do? Well, I’m a witch and a spiritual educator, and I know how to meditate. And more importantly, I know that I don’t have to teach my child in a way that is antithetical to their way of being. They (and other children) can be introduced to the practice of meditation in a more approachable way to help them get started successfully, and then we can help them gradually bring stillness into their practice to whatever degree is right for them.
Even if your goal isn’t for your child(ren) to sit quiet and still for an hour in a dark room (which really isn’t the best goal for children, but it’s what my kiddo and I have to work with right now), teaching basic meditation skills to kids will help them build emotional resilience and get them better in touch with themselves. A practice they can truly benefit from in our increasingly uncertain world.
The key is to help them find their own way to gentle focus in their minds through activities that better align with their nature (depending on the child or group, of course). A few different ways meditation can be approached:
Walking meditations
Drawing/painting/writing meditations
Guided meditations
Yoga poses
By using prompts and reflections before and after an active meditation session, you can start to help your child(ren) understand what a meditative mindset feels like, and how to cultivate it. Slowly, most children will get more and more comfortable with focusing on their bodies and quieting their minds. Some of them, to a point, with regular practice, are indeed capable of sitting quietly in a darkened room and truly meditating for an hour. But not the majority – that’s a big ask of anyone.
The most important aspects of guiding anyone in meditation – including yourself – is a mindset of gentleness and forgiveness. Teach kids and yourself to be loving and kind to yourselves as you learn any type of meditation. It doesn’t work in the long term if we berate ourselves for ‘not doing it right’.
Any time spent learning meditative and mindful practices is always healing and worthwhile. And the younger we are when we learn, the more likely we are to adopt these practices as adults.
Blessed Be.
